Biology Building East

Free newspapers in the bathroom? City of literature indeed! Don't have the need or time for one right now, thanks. No, no, just passing through, if you get my meaning. Thanks again! 2/5

Mesa Pizza

Toppings are the word when you go to Mesa. You can use toppings to satiate any non-pizza cravings. Want a gyro? Have gyro pizza! Want a taco? Have taco pizza! Want a pizza pizza? Fine, you ingrate, eat up. Going into the bathroom, I was puzzled to see that the toppings carried over into this most private of places. What is that on top of that toilet? What is it, I wonder. I will not eat it, but I shall order a plain toilet with no toppings, in the future, thanks. 2/5

Painting Building First Floor

Hidden bathroom of the painting studio, you are covered in rust that comes from when creativity meets academia, plastic cups for drinking bleach/urine cocktails, art magazines to insulate my coat to brave the cold walk home after a night's work wasted. Hidden bathroom, I wish you had stayed hidden. 2/5

Quinton's

Far away, in a dark, damp place you will find this less than lovely
lavatory. Though technically this room is big enough for quite a few
people, I'm not sure that's a good thing. Whether it is more harrowing
to go into this cave alone or to enter and finds others waiting, I am
not sure. I am sure that I don't want to find out. I have been to
Quinton's many times since starting this blog, but tonight was the
first time since that I ventured back to this hole. I wish it were to
be the last. This 2/5 makes holding it indefinitely sound like a safe
option.

Yacht Club

It's always nice to be around folks who sail for pleasure. Well, until
you go into the bathroom. Head through the blacklight maelstrom on a
bearing due North and you will find a port full of piss and posters.
Veteran hands know not to touch anything, if they can help it. The
smell of salt doesn't quite permeate the air, but I can fill the stink
getting in my beard. If you can hold fast, you might live to tell the
tale of your trip 'round this 2/5 bathroom.

Zio Johno's / Pancheros

What happened? I was eating lunch at Zio Johno's and I went into the bathroom. I exited quickly after an average experience to find myself in Pancheros! Had I stepped through a portal to a parallel dimension? Was I unstuck in time and space? No, the two restaurants share this bathroom, and I had wandered through the wrong door. Too bad, a 4th dimensional trip would've raised the rating on this above a 2/5.

The Mill

Red! Red is the color of the walls. Also the color of my face if I try
to use this room with another person. That is probably the most
pathetic privacy wall I have ever seen. I do like the color, but the
place is so unclean and the urinals hardly work, which is amazing
because all a urinal has to do to function is flush. They aren't
completely unusable, however, and I was able to go, so I will rate
this a barely adequate 2/5.

Thai Flavors

I try not to compare bathrooms, necessarily, I don't use an ordinal
scale, but the bathroom at Taco Bell was a million times nicer than
this. It seems that bad bathrooms are kind of typical for Asian
restaurants, or is that just me? I'm glad to see that they do have
cleaning products, but they shouldn't be strewn about the room amongst trash. Anyways, I won't hold this against Thai Flavors too much, but my love for their curry still won't push my rating above a 2/5.

Colonial Lanes

Some of the most interesting bathrooms I've been in were at bowling
alleys. Not always the cleanest, but usually pretty interesting. Well,
I can't complain that it looks and smelt like a locker room, because
it literally is a locker room. The urinals had no privacy and the
locks were gone on the stall doors, such that you could peek through.
I did. I left without going, but I could have, so I guess I have to rate it a 2/5.

Subway

This bathroom is totally appropriate for a Subway. Just like the sandwich shop, this bathroom offers choices, all of which are slightly unclean and only kind of appetizing. You'd think with all that footlong money, they could at least keep this as nice as a McDonald's, but I guess that letting their customers "pee fresh" isn't on the menu. Sorry Jared, but I have to rate this a 2/5.

Senior Center - 1st Floor

I never like bathrooms that feel like a locker room, but this bathroom
actually has lockers. So it kind of IS a locker room. Other than that,
it's pretty much identical to the bathroom upstairs. It is nice to see
a changing table in the mens' room, but does that make up for the
locker room feeling? Almost, but I'll still have to rate this a 2/5.

Prairie Lights

Really? I mean, what is this? I obviously don't want blame Prairie Lights for this, but who else would do this? It's not so weird or funny that someone would sneak in cardboard to do this, but why would any employee do this, condemning themselves to fishing soggy cardboard
out of the urinal later. Needless to say, I did not follow the
instructions, and left, rating this experience a quizzical 2/5.

The Sanctuary

The illusion of high class (pronounce: snobby) that permeates The
Sanctuary is shattered as soon as one enters the bathroom. Quite small
for what is evidently a two-seater, my experience was pretty much
ruined when a man entered, used the toilet behind me, belched loudly,
and then left without washing his hands. The actual location doesn't
help its cause, and I'll be giving this one a 2/5.

The Union Bar - Upstairs

I knew going in that it wouldn't be good. You might be surprised
however, when I say that it was actually better than I had expected.
There was no real noticeable smell in there, good or bad, and the
floor was wet, but in this weather, I'm going to give them the benefit
of the doubt and assume it was a result of the ice-covered shoes. The
lack of any toilet paper is the first documentation of a bathroom bias
against men in Iowa City. It served the purpose of being a place to
go, but just barely, so I will give this one a 2/5.

Pappajohn Business Building - West 4th Floor

I was at the Pappajohn building for an award ceremony, during which I
had a great deal of iced tea and lemonade. Afterwards, I went through
a lovely purple door to find this bathroom. The protruding style of
urinal is not my favorite and it looks like they installed the
smallest privacy divder they could. The tile walls made it feel like a
locker room, and a cramped one at that. It was clean enough, but
overall I would have to give a rating of 2/5.